Question:
How many bridal showers are too many? A couple who has lived together for 1 1/2 year has decided to have a very lavish wedding. I hardly know either of them. They are having a bridal tea, a tool and gadget shower, a bridesmaid shower, a Christmas shower and a couples shower. I believe there are two more planned also. I have been invited to several of these events and I am beginning to feel like I am being invited just to get a gift. As I stated above I hardly know these people. Please advise.
Answer:
Dear Donna,
Hummm! Maybe this couple should apply to the Guinness Book of World Records for the most showers held! Goodness!
It almost seems as if this couple is on the troll for bling. Most likely they aren't, so let's go positive in our thinking. Let's assume that what's happening here is that the Bride and Groom-to-Be are so excited about their nuptials that they've gone a registry too far! The couple naturally wants to have the most memorable of weddings, but it seems they've gone overboard. Since the holidays are upon us, they probably decided to stage several showers to accommodate everyone's hectic schedules.
Since we're within our rights to finesse this one, read between the lines so that you can use the subtle to your advantage. If you get questioned by anyone as to why you aren't showing up with gift in tow at all or several of the showers, simply say you're holiday party-challenged and soooo regret that you can't show up to more events!
Check out these two Diva Rules:
- Give out of joy, never out of obligation.
- Bridal etiquette dictates that only one gift is given for the shower and one gift is given for the wedding.
You get to decide whether you want to gift the bride at her tea or decline in favor of attending the wedding and gifting the couple there.
You mentioned that you hardly know these people. All the more reason to take the pressure off yourself and think about how you'd like to participate. What feels genuine to you? We've set forth the etiquette involved, so all that's required now is for you to let your heart be your guide.
Happy Showering,
Susan "The Shower Diva"
Where Fun Reigns!™
